The grief overlay

Bearing witness to loss, of any kind, creates a shift in all one has ever known to be true and real. Fleeting memories, questionings, longings and urges all enter at their own risk, causing daily rupture in functioning. A more gentle word I like to refer to for this phenomenon is an overlay. An overlay alters the base of anything, be it decorative or in this case to protect something. The grief overlay which alters all of life after loss, attaches itself, or can I say “leeches” onto everything we experience, causing a pendulation (back and forth) of moving toward traumatic memories then back to the present.

Peter Levine, the orignator of Somatic Experiencing, used this term to describe this rhythmic movement between trauma (contraction) and relief (expansion).

The goal in navigating this grief overlay, in therapy, is to learn how to find equilibrium between the two….this is the innate rhythm of healing. You move between a resourced state and distressing event. Guiding though this, you find something that brings you peace then back to the distressing feeling or memory. During EMDR therapy, this is done through bilateral stimulation (BLS) to enhance your mind’s attention to each.

The benefits of this can help regulate your nervous system, integrate the traumatic memory into your narrative without re-traumatization and supporting the healing response.

If this sounds like something that would allow you peace and ease, reach out to connect:-) - Erin